It’s happened. You regret your decision to divorce or to break up with your ex. You’ve found yourself thinking about him all the time, missing his company and the memories you shared together. You’re looking at old photos and you start to think that your decision may have been a bit hasty. So now you’re wondering if that damage has been done and if it’s too late to get him back… You’re in luck because you’ve found an article that’s going to tell you how to get him back if I broke up with my boyfriend, and what exactly you need to do to succeed. In love anything is possible as long as you follow the rules I’m about to share with you!
I know that you might be feeling stressed out right now because you’ve become aware of the consequences of your actions. The man you love is no longer by your side because you had decided to leave him. He’s hurt, he’s angry, and you’re wondering if he could ever forgive you and take you back. In this article we will take a look at what he’s feeling, what to do to make him want you back, and what to expect along the ride. Heads up; it’s not an easy feat, but stick with it and you’ll see results sooner than you expect!
Important question: Why do you want to get your ex back after you broke up?
Before we go any further, I want you to take a moment to ask yourself why exactly you want to get back together with your ex if you left him. Be very honest with yourself because this is a huge decision. It impacts both of you on a huge scale!
I broke up with my boyfriend but I don’t like to see them this sad
I’ve been surprised to find that sometimes when I ask people this question, they start telling me, “I broke up with my boyfriend but I hate seeing my ex so upset!” The more we talk about it, the more I start to see that they are actually starting to wonder about asking him to return simply because they feel guilty. I saw this happen with one of my best friends.
He got back together with his ex because he didn’t like seeing her heartbroken, and then surprise, they separated again not longer after that. He wasn’t happy with the relationship so he broke up with her, then he took her back because she was sad, and then they broke up again because neither person was actually happy. You see the pointlessness…? Not to mention the emotional roller coaster… Asking an ex to come back after I broke up with him is very serious and should not be taken lightly.
I broke up with him but I’m lonely now
Maybe you didn’t realize that this is the case until you read that title. “Wait.. Do I really want to be with this person or do I just not want to be alone?”
Getting someone back should never be done just because you don’t like being alone. It’s unfair to both of you because you’re giving your ex false hope and you’re cheating yourself from being truly happy. Don’t play games. Besides, it’s imperative to be able to stand on your own two feet. There is an incredible amount of growth that happens when a person is alone for a while. No one says you should remain single forever, but it is really healthy. I know that doesn’t sound very enticing when you’ve just broken up, but with some hindsight you see how important it really is.
If you’re feeling that this is the case for you, take some time to enjoy being on your own before you start working one trying to make your ex come back after you just broke up with boyfriend. Take some time to explore whether or not you’re emotionally dependent on this person or not. Do you need them in order to be happy? If the answer is yes, then it’s time to do a bit of work in the confidence department!
My boyfriend and I broke up but I’ve put things into perspective
Time heals wounds, believe me. A person can feel like their sadness will be eternal, but it won’t be.
Speaking of time… Do you want to find out how to get your ex back because enough time has passed for things to become clearer in your mind in terms of how you feel about this person? Are you realizing, we broke up but I still love him? Sometimes a little distance does wonders for getting rid of confusion. Relationships sometimes encounter obstacles and challenges that make a person feel overwhelmed. It’s not uncommon for someone to back out when the pressure becomes too much, and then regret their decision when they realize that they didn’t have to take it that far.
Perhaps you’ve just come to realize that this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with and it was a huge mistake to leave them.
Don’t worry, it’s not the end of the world. We can help you win your ex back!
The ugly truth after I split up with my boyfriend
Would you believe me if I told you that getting your ex back is actually going to be the easiest part of what awaits you? The truth is that if you follow the rules that I’ve listed in the second half of this article, you will be able to catch your ex’s attention and attract them back into your life. The tricky thing is going to be keeping them.
Once you’ve showed them why they should be with you, you’ll have to maintain it all. Break ups don’t happen without reason, so it’s going to be imperative that you pinpoint what wasn’t working and figure out long term solutions. If you convince your ex to return after ending a relationship with someone you love you will have to start a NEW relationship with them. The moment it starts to resemble the one that wasn’t working, separation will start looming over your heads again.
As with anything, there is no guarantee of success, but if you do your work, the odds will be in your favor.
I broke up with my bf: Why I need a plan ?
When you’re thinking of ways to get your ex back, never underestimate the importance of having a plan.
It’s a delicate process after I broke up with my boyfriend, so your actions need to be well organized and well thought out. If it’s not the case, you risk being messy and drifting further away from your goal. Designing a plan of action requires that you assess the situation and that you understand what exactly went wrong. Once you’ve done this, you’ll have more clarity.
Taking your time is one of the keys for how to get him to come back after you’ve split up with boyfriend and having a plan will ensure you take things slow. The worst thing you could do right now is to rush and to pressure your ex! Besides, if your ex takes you back, they need to feel that it was their idea, and not because you’ve pressured them into it.
Having a plan will also help you to keep calm and stay focused on what you’re doing.
Getting back together is a lot to think about, whether you’ve broken up with boyfriend or not, and if you’re just winging it chances are that you’ll panic, act out, and not respect certain rules that are in place to increase your chances of success. It’s kind of like if you have some important to be in half an hour, but you have no idea how to get there or where it is. You’re going to enter the destination into your GPS and get a clear picture of what you need to do instead of racing around all the streets trying to find the right one…
I broke up with my boyfriend but I’ll get him back if I DON’T do the following!
Getting an ex back will require that you avoid certain actions like the plague! You don’t want to give your ex reason to want to get away from you, right? So let’s take a look at some of the most important pieces of breaking up with someone you love advice. NOT doing these things is just as important as doing the things I recommend in the last portion of this article!
- Begging. Oh man this is the worst. Whatever you do, do not blow up your ex’s phone right now. Both of you need space to breathe, and stifling your ex is just going to make them run for the hills.
- Reasoning with them: Don’t try to convince your ex that they’d be better off with you. As I mentioned above, if they come back to you it has to be their decision. Sure, you can do your part to make them more likely to return, but they won’t do it if they don’t feel like it was their idea!
- Showering them with I love you’s: Now is not the time to smother your ex with love. You left, they’re hurt, you’ve talked about your feelings enough for now.
- Giving them gifts: Again, now is not the time. And what’s more, this makes you look desperate, or like you’re trying to buy their love back! You won’t win your ex’s heart back buying him new stuff. Seriously.
There are also some things that you must avoid doing for yourself when you want to get ex back. Sometimes people try to change for the other person… This is not going to help you because it’s not a genuine change that you decided you should make, and it puts pressure on you to use this change to satisfy your partner. Lasting improvements stick when they’re done for yourself.
Do not become idle when you’re wondering how to get my ex back! First of all, you’re not going to get your ex back by sitting on the couch, thinking, I broke up with him but I want him back. Second of all, idleness often leads to depression, which further prevents you from moving forward towards your goal. It becomes a negative cycle. You need to stay busy because that’s what’s going to bring you closer to your goals (both ex-oriented and not!)
And lastly, do not let your ex take advantage of you. Yes, you just broke up with boyfriend so you’re not quite being seen in the best light, but don’t let your ex use you. For example, if they ask you to do a bunch of things for them, say yes, but within reason. For example if they want you to go pick up their dry cleaning and pay for it and bring it to them…. Well… They might be milking the situation a bit – especially if they’ve picked up on the fact that you want them back. Be kind, be reasonable, but stand your ground as well. No one likes a doormat.
The 3 steps after breaking up with someone you still love!
Adhering to these rules and following these steps are going to be the determining factors in your attempt at getting back together with him after you left him. Well, that and the fact that nothing can be guaranteed. I’m not going to tell you that you will 100% for sure get back together. All I can do is give you the tools to significantly increase your chances of success.
I know this is hard when you break up but still in love, and there are all kinds of temptations to make mistakes, but you have to remain in control. You will be very happy you became such a master of self control when your ex is back in your arms!
1. The golden rule after I broke up with my boyfriend
If you’re not familiar with the no contact rule, read this article immediately because it’s going to be your best friend right now. The no contact rule explain here by Adrian a broke up expert is arguably the most successful tool for how to get my ex back. Why? Because it basically makes your ex fear losing you for good, and therefore makes him realize how much he actually wants you. I understand that he might be hurt and angry with you for leaving him, but once the anger subsides he will realize that he misses you.
How do I use the no contact rule when I have broken up with my boyfriend?
While you’re using this strategy, you do not get in touch with him in any way and you have to be very disciplined. A lot of people that use this tool end up failing because they can’t fight the temptation to contact their ex. This puts them right back at square one!
His reaction will vary, and you can read about what to expect in this article.
Get him back after you breaking up with boyfriend by attracting them from a distance. Trust me, it’s possible to do even if you’re not in touch. In fact, it’s even easier because you can use social media and word of mouth to your advantage… By bringing positive change into your life and becoming visibly happier and more fulfilled, you immediately become more attractive to everyone around you. The key is to really focus on making your life the way you want it to be. Remind them of the person they fell in love with and become an even better version of them.
I broke up with my ex but I want him back: A word of caution…
Since your ex is the dumpee in this situation, be careful to not make it look like you’re just thrilled to be free of him. Post pictures of you with your closest friends instead of you with random guys. Post pictures of you trying your hand at photography instead of you partying in clubs.
During this time, focus on improvements. Go to the gym, focus on getting ahead in work, pick up an old hobby, and don’t forget to spend ample time with your friends and family. Getting an ex you leave is like killing two birds with one stone when you use the no contact rule. Not only do you vastly improve your life, but you make your ex miss you after breaking up with him.
Take some time to fully accept and understand the breakup. Accepting it allows you to move forward without being anchored in the past, and understanding why you broke up enables you to figure out solutions for the future. You two broke up for a reason so when you get back together, it can’t be the same as it was before.
I should mention; if you broke up with your ex boyfriend and you’re using the no contact rule, make sure you don’t use it for too long. Use your judgment. If your breakup was messy then you can use it for up to 3 months, but otherwise try to limit it to about 30 days.
2. Getting back in contact after I broke up with boyfriend
There are many different methods for getting back in touch to get back your ex. You can send a text message that is hard to resist replying to. For example, “You’ll never guess what I saw today…” When you get back in touch, conversation needs to remain light at first! It’s really important, because you don’t want your ex to feel pressured or stressed out about what’s happening.
You could also try the “empty text” trick that’s a bit less sure fire but effective nonetheless. You send an empty message to your ex and chances are that they’ll respond to you asking what you meant to send. You can play it off as an accident but start talking to them anyway! Getting my ex back even if I broke up with my boyfriend isn’t impossible as long as you reintroduce contact slowly and gently.
If you’re wondering, “Should I call him after breakup ” and you’ve let some time pass, then yes! That’s a good way to go as well. You can call him up to see how he’s doing, you could “accidentally” bump into him somewhere. Greet him with an inviting smile, keep conversation light and focused on the good things you’ve got going on, and look your best. That said; don’t blow up his phone once you’re back in touch! Let him breathe.
When you get back in contact to get your ex back after breaking up but still in love, avoid talking about the relationship and about the breakup! Don’t say anything like, “I miss you,” or, “I’m sorry and I just want you back!” When you meet up, do NOT call it a date or else your ex will immediately put his guard up. You want to rebuild complicity and trust now. Your desires and the relationship will come up in conversation eventually, so let it happen naturally as you rebuild your bond.
The key for fixing things after I broke up with him: Taking things slow
As I just said, the focus should be on rebuilding the complicity between you. You’ll have the opportunity to apologize if you had done something wrong, and offer solutions to the issues that your relationship had been facing. Getting back together after you break up with someone you love is not an easy task, especially if you’re the one that broke their heart, but in love nothing is impossible.
Start doing new things together. You want to introduce something fresh and new so that your ex feels that they’re not stepping right back into something that’s going to hurt them (they don’t want to re experience the relationship that ended up with them being broken up with.) If you want to get back with ex you have to make them want to start a new relationship with you!
Taking things slowly allows you to handle things as they come up and to practice pattern breaking. If something comes up that is reminiscent of the issues you were having in your relationship, take the time to incorporate your solutions. Taking your time also helps with the pressure that comes with piecing things back together. You want everything to be perfect this time so sometimes you feel overwhelmed.
I broke up but I still love him: Patience is a virtue!
In summary, if you left your boyfriend and you want him back, you’re going to have to be determined yet patient at the same time. There’s no sense in rushing, begging, or pressuring. Time is going to let tensions and pain heal while allowing you to change what needs to be changed. You can become a better version of yourself and in the process you’ll be able to offer a better relationship to your ex. With some distance, you’ll eventually be able to propose proper solutions that ensure that your relationship is even more solid than it was before.
As I explained, getting over a breakup when you broke it off, and getting the man you love back is the easy part. The hard part is maintaining the new relationship and not falling back into past problems. Once you and your ex are back together, you must ensure that you both communicate with one another about what you are happy with and what you feel needs improvement. Neither of you can read the other’s mind!
Be open and honest when you two begin talking about your relationship and breakup and be attentive when your ex opens up to you. Ask them questions and offer solutions. Show them that you want to improve things for both of you and that you’re willing to do the work. Don’t make the mistake of getting your ex back and letting things deteriorate just as they did before.
As always, if you want one on one guidance when you’re thinking I broke up with my boyfriend now I want him back, get in touch with us today by leaving your comment on this article or by visiting our coaching page!
Your relationship expert for how to get my ex back